


Sticks and Stones

by Fox



Category: Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2000-06-16
Updated: 2000-06-16
Packaged: 2017-10-02 21:00:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fox/pseuds/Fox
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I am not now, nor have I ever been, George Lucas.</p>
    </blockquote>





	Sticks and Stones

**Author's Note:**

> I am not now, nor have I ever been, George Lucas.

"I'm sorry I was fighting, Master," Obi-Wan said. "But ... but ..."

"But what, Padawan? What have I taught you about finding other outlets for your anger?"

"But -- "

"Nothing any of the other students said should have driven you to fisticuffs."

Suppressing his urge to laugh out loud at his master's use of the word 'fisticuffs,' Obi-Wan merely murmured, "Yes, Master," and submitted to Qui-Gon's healing energy.

"Particularly with other Jedi. I'm very disappointed in you, Padawan."

"I'm sorry, Master. I'll remember what you've said, next time."

"Next time what, Obi-Wan?"

"Next time someone calls you a wuss, Master. I'll remember that you've warned me to avoid, ah, _fisticuffs,_ and find another outlet for my anger."

Qui-Gon paused. "A wuss?"

"Yes, Master."

"Other padawans were calling me a wuss?"

"Yes, Master. And they wouldn't believe me when I defended you."

"Which students were these?"

"I don't think it's anyone you know, Master."

"Do I know their masters, these students I don't know?"

"I couldn't say, Master."

Qui-Gon gritted his teeth. "Very well." There was a long pause. "And you defended me?"

"I felt it was my duty to do so, Master."

"Your duty? You defended me because it was your duty?"

"Yes, Master."

"Not because you believe that I am not a -- what was that word?"

"A wuss, Master."

"Because you believe that I am not a wuss?"

"What I believe is not material, Master. It is my duty as a padawan to defend my master's honor."

"I see." There was an even longer pause.

"I think I'm all set, Master. The bruise on my eye will take care of itself."

"Very well, Obi-Wan. You no doubt wish to attend to your studies."

"Yes, Master." The young man rose.

"Obi-Wan?" Qui-Gon called, as his student retreated to his room.

"Yes, Master?"

"_Do_ you think I'm a wuss?"

**Author's Note:**

> The IRC is a silly, silly place.
> 
> One evening, in the #tpm channel, RavenD asked me to tell a story. I normally don't have much luck coming up with stuff on the fly, but then Caroline Baker provoked me:
> 
> [0:53] Caroline: I'm sorry, but Qui-Gon's kind of a wuss  
> [0:53] Fox: Qui-Gon's kind of a *wuss*?  
> [0:53] Fox: Aren't you the one who hasn't seen the movie?  
> [0:54] Caroline: yeah, but I can tell.  
> [0:55] Fox: Caro -- if you haven't seen the movie, you shouldn't go trashing my man QG.  
> [0:55] Fox: [g]  
> [0:55] Caroline: heh, no, you're right  
> * Fox prepares to defend Qui-Gon's honor  
> [0:56] Caroline: Fox: draw your saber!  
> [0:56] Caroline: that's the other thing. How much of a stud can you be if your weapon makes such a ridiculous noise?  
> [0:56] Caroline:   
> [0:56] Fox: Obi-Wan's weapon also makes a ridiculous noise  
> [0:57] Caroline: Yeah, but Qui-Gon's the only one who accidentally singes his girly hair with it  
> [0:57] Fox: All right, Caroline. EN GARDE!


End file.
